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Fly... (for an old guy) Dear Santa, By Roger Richards
Thank you in advance for all of the following: • My list of gifts for 2006 • A win in NHRA Top Fuel for Clay Millican, JR Todd and Melanie Troxel. • A record year for the IHRA in attendance. • A caring lawyer for my friend Mike Aiello who really knows what he or she is doing. • A bag of coal for the insurance company that seems to take pleasure in causing Mike pain. • A ride for my buddies Carl and Donna Baker. • A 6.50 run in NHRA Pro Stock. • A 5.99 run in Pro Mod. • Speaking of Pro Mod, how about that NHRA thing? • A No. 1 qualifying pass for Annette Summer or Mike Moran in their Turbo Pro Mods. a
d v e r t i s e m e n t • Another unbelievable year of growth for CompetitionPlus.com • 75 degrees, 60% humidity and 500 feet adjusted air at every single event. If you can pull this one off, you get all of the Oreo cookies in the bag. • Personal Hooter’s girl to bring me a cool drink on hot days when you don’t make good on the previous wish. • A wife who doesn’t get mad when you make good on the above request. • Broadband access through Verizon at all of the tracks in the world. • A pair of Nikon D200 bodies and a gosh almighty long lens. • The best drag racing shot of all time. One that will make Steve Reyes and Francis Butler drool. • Another 50,000 miles from the Astro van. • Another 10 years with my doggie friend, Yoda, the pug. • Record attendance for cars and spectators for the Torco’s CompetitionPlus.com promoted Eastern Spring Test Nationals at South Georgia Motorsports Park. • A name change for the BUTT RUB fries at the concession at South Georgia Motorsports Park. • A web cast system for audio and video from the track without having to fight all of the big networks. If they were so worried about us stealing their product, they would already have the system in place and making money. • A wireless Internet system at all tracks to allow teams to keep in touch with the world • An Internet message board where all of the participants can actually read and write and know where the spell check is on their computer. I know this part is unreal but I would like for them to use the forum as it is intended instead of turning everything into a battle. Good luck with this one, Santa. I think perfect weather at all drag racing events would be easier to accomplish. • A map to the spell check on my computer. A simple map if you please. • A different voice on the GPS system. She sounds like the witch from the Wizard of Oz. I want one that is sympathetic when I do still get lost. She should sound like Mae West and say: “Now, honey, you missed the little road on the right back there, but don’t worry sweetie, I will get you back on track in a moment if you will just slow down and turn left at the next intersection.” Instead of just saying: “Off course. Re-calculating” with a sneer. • A satellite radio station with a comedy channel that doesn’t use profanity as the main theme. • As much fun in 2006 as I had in 2005. a
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Dear
Santa,
© Competitionplus 2005
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