And in a snap, Shirley Muldowney had the perfect solution how to give an incompetent house painter the brush-off. Even though she was recuperating from knee-replacement surgery last winter, she proved she was not going to sit by and let husband Rahn Tobler's and her $1,400 investment go to waste. 

The guy was a mess. He didn't bring the paint. He didn't bring the crew he promised would help him complete the job on time. So she backed his truck up to a spot near the driveway where it was wedged between the house, their truck and the woods that hug the property and this oaf wouldn't have the driving skills to get it out.  

"We held that truck hostage," she said. 

The guy should've known better than to back-talk her, too.  

a d v e r t i s e m e n t

Click to visit our sponsor's website

She called Tobler at the Kalitta Motorsports shop about three miles away -- where he works as crew chief  for NHRA Top Fuel points leader Doug Kalitta -- and told him she had a problem. Tobler told team manager Jim Oberhofer, who threw his pencil down on his desk and rounded up his troops, asking, "Hey -- who wants to kick some ass?!" The members from all three race teams piled into cars and zipped over to see how they might help the gentleman -- who by then was more than compliant. 

"It's nice to know I have people looking out for me," Muldowney said. "So I bring them treats." 

Other than that, she said, a day in the life of her "retirement" might sound boring. It's not always about battles, although in the parlance of hockey-crazy Michigan, she'll "go" with somebody if he needs it.  

"I pretty much have a schedule I stick to for getting things done," Muldowney said. "I do a lot of domestic things. There's a lot to take care of here. Thank God I enjoy it." 

She and Tobler moved at the end of the 2003 season from their longtime home near Armada, Michigan, northeast of Detroit, to the Ypsilanti-Ann Arbor area to be closer to the Kalitta Motorsports headquarters. With their new digs, Muldowney has gotten to tend her flower garden and enjoy the quiet that's a soothing contrast to the cacophony of the race track. 

She enjoys cooking, as she always has. "I sew," she added. "It sounds really very boring." 

a d v e r t i s e m e n t

Click to visit our sponsor's website

Her days actually are full. "I'm just as busy as when I was driving," she said. 

Muldowney spends a fair amount of time with fans still fascinated by her 30-year career in the tough Top Fuel ranks. That makes her a popular customer at the local post office, where she lugs packets of autographed photos and memorabilia to be mailed -- sometimes with a warning to the recipients that she doesn't want to see any of this on eBay. 

The Muldowney menagerie is missing the two canaries she had to give away because they required more attention than she had to give. However, it includes two wild cats who live on the back deck, on the property, and in the woods. And Peanut, Muldowney's precious little Chihuahua, soon will be getting to play with her new little sister.  

"With Peanut's sister, we'll have two little female dogs," the famous animal-adorer said. "That means it's going to be awhile before I get my new carpeting." 

The time will fly, as Muldowney will continue to be plenty busy as Zantrex-3 team and sponsor-relations representative. Zantrex-3 is the primary sponsor for David Grubnic's Top Fuel car that's the No. 3 entry from the Kalitta stable. 

At the April 15-17 Las Vegas race, Kalitta Motorsports rolled out a fourth car, one that Sydney, Australia, businessman Santo Rapisarda had purchased from racing magnate Connie Kalitta. Ben Marshall drove the pink-and-black dragster sponsored by the StriVectin-SD brand of facial cream. The anti-wrinkle, anti-aging cream that's the cosmetic craze these days is distributed exclusively by Basic Research, the Salt Lake City-headquartered conglomerate that distributes the in-demand Zantrex-3 weight-loss supplement.  

On hand that weekend at Las Vegas Motor Speedway, without any formal or even informal welcome from NHRA President Tom Compton who stood a suite away and observed the buzz only through the window, were editors and representatives of about 20 high-profile women's interest magazines. In addition, buyers from such top-end department stores as Bloomingdale's, Saks Fifth Avenue, and Macy's were intrigued by this non-traditional form of marketing for both drag racing and the cosmetic industry. 

a d v e r t i s e m e n t

Click to visit our sponsor's website

Muldowney said the Zantrex-3/StriVectin-SD distributor "tried to work with NHRA, but they couldn't because of a lack of communication on NHRA's part." 

She certainly made up for the sanctioning body's indifference. She showed them a marvelous time on behalf of Basic Research, introducing them to the power and speed and marketing potential of drag racing on a glorious weekend at one of the most picturesque facilities on NHRA's 23-race circuit. As a result, the StriVectin-SD folks have shown interest in continuing their connection with Kalitta Motorsports. 

(Even before the race, Gina Gay, spokeswoman for Klein-Becker, maker of StriVectin-SD, predicted as much. "We see Top Fuel racing as the next big trend. Sponsoring a car helps us reach a larger male audience and introduces female StriVectin users to this thrilling sport," she said in a prepared statement. "We're looking forward to the Las Vegas race and helping to grow Top Fuel racing. We're confident the race will be a big boost for StriVectin, and we fully expect this success will mean a longer-term sponsorship." Afterward, the indication to Muldowney was that remains the company's commitment.) 

So Muldowney, legendary for jolting drag racing with a new way of thinking 30 years ago, is doing that off the track today. And she's having a blast, promoting Grubnic and sponsor Zantrex-3.  

a d v e r t i s e m e n t

Click to visit our sponsor's website

"Zantrex has been a very good find, although they found me first," she said, referring to the fact that Zantrex representatives had hoped to lure her back into a Top Fuel dragster after her 2003 retirement. "My interest is not in driving a car. I wanted [this sponsorship] for the sport, and I wanted it for Connie. 

"The deal was race-ready," Muldowney said. "It would have been a travesty if they had gone to another team. It would have been a nightmare. They couldn't have done a better thing for themselves." 

She loves extolling Grubnic's virtues, too.  

"He's so perfect for Zantrex. He's so classy. He looks good. He talks well. He fits the image. Women love him. He's a good driver. He digs deep. He's a great find," Muldowney said.  

She's equally appreciative and admiring of marketing specialist Fred Miller, who's spearheading the company's drag-racing marketing program. She said she knows he will be a conscientious steward of Zantrex's money. "I see sponsor waste in drag racing. At least that's not going to happen on our watch," she said, adding that Miller "is better than wonderful. He's a dream come true." 

No one, though, is more of a dream come true for Muldowney than Tobler.  

He's the one who inspired her to recover from her wicked wreck in 1984, and he supported her decision to return to racing. He's the one who watched over her with his heart, and with his skillful hands he made sure she was not only safe but a winner still in that dragster they owned and operated in the black. 

And he is the one for whom she finally stepped from the cockpit. 

"I wanted the load off Rahn," she said. "He kept us in business for a long time, but he's one guy. He couldn't do it all."  

She clearly is happy that he hooked up with her longtime friend Kalitta. She said Tobler "is in a great situation. It couldn't be nicer. Conrad's terrific to work for and work with. Conrad made that kind of nice, as did Jim O. and everybody. Conrad never bothers Rahn."  

Muldowney  isn't the least bit surprised that Doug Kalitta leads the Top Fuel standings. She has complete faith in Tobler's ability to guide drivers to championships. She knows, because he helped her win three NHRA championships and one AHRA title, in addition to 18 national event victories in NHRA competition, three in IHRA, and eight in AHRA.  

"I knew he would be deadly if he ever got his hands on some money," she said. 

Retirement isn't a horrible yoke she has affixed to herself. It isn't a burden, nor did she think it would be. Certainly she recognized it would be an adjustment, but, she said, "It isn't really as bad as I thought it would be."  

She is proud just to watch Tobler work, although now and again, she said, he'll assign her a chore for the race car.  

"The most exciting thing I do is go to the races and root for the boys," she says. She means Her Boys.  

"I hope to God I'm there when Grubnic wins his first one," Muldowney said, referring to the limited number of races she attends. "I know I'm supposed to root for the Zantrex car, and I do. Deep down in my heart, I want it [the championship] for Rahn." Referring to the Mac Tools Dragster Doug Kalitta drives, she said, "I root for Big Red." 

So she still has at least a tinge of that rebel spirit in her.  

She mused that if reincarnation is a reality, "I'd like to come back as a big guy who can kick ass if he wants to."