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BEFORE YOU MOVE ON… |
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There are a few things that you simply MUST do in your life in order to be able to say “I've done it all”. In no particular order, these must be included on your “life's resume”.
Like someone once said, if you are a Buddhist, you go to Tibet . If you are a gear head, you go to Bonneville. There is no other place on this planet quite like the Bonneville Salt Flats . There is also nothing on earth that can prepare you for what it's like - nothing. Whatever you may have heard about it, it's true. Its vastness will shake you and bring tears to your eyes. There is no natural sound there, just total silence. The word “big” is just not descriptive enough. In the summer, the heat will fry you like a burger. Birds do not fly over the Salt Flats. There are tiny creatures there that do not appear anywhere else on earth. When you kneel down, there will be a wet spot on your pants at the knee because the entire Salt Flats is literally floating on water. Without the proper sunglasses, you will go blind in less than an hour from the intensity of the “whiteness”. You will need a sun hat such as an “African pith helmet”, or if you wear a baseball cap, you will need a rag to cover the back of your neck. Any cap or hat must be a real hat, and not one with a mesh top. The tops of your ears will turn red and bleed. You will need to cover your arms and legs (shorts are out). Even then, you will need the best sun block you can get, and the same goes for lip balm. Be prepared to have your lips turn to powder and blow away. The word “chapped” does not do justice to what will become of your lips. Sounds like a place that you just can't wait to visit, doesn't it? Bonneville Speed Week is always in August and is sanctioned by the Southern California Timing Association, www.scta-bni.org . This event has been going on for many, many years, long before drag racing became the only game in town. The SCTA has classes, rules and everything else, including a membership made up of old gray beards. The SCTA also still sponsors events at the Muroc Dry Lake in California , too. Talk about some unique cars, too. Do you have a 1953 Studebaker (with a 392 Hemi Chizler, of course), or have an old belly tank laying around? As long as your car has Moon disks, you are ready. If you have to ask what Moon disks are, forget about Utah . Anything and everything has a class, and there are two parallel courses, the “short course” and the “long course.” The “long course” is for cars running over 200-MPH and the length depends on the weather. It could be 10 miles or sometimes more. Depending on your final rear end gear ratio, you could be winding out in 1 st gear for about a mile or more before you shift into 2 nd . There is only one issue to deal with, and that's “top speed”. How fast does it go? Everybody who is anybody has probably run there at one time or another. In the fifties, even cowboy singer Roy Rogers found out just how fast his hopped-up Ford station wagon went at Bonneville. What makes the Salt Flats the way they are? Simple - rain, heat and wind, in that order. It rains there from October through about May. By the time the rain stops, the place is entirely underwater. As spring and summer settle in, the intense sun starts to evaporate the water and when the water is just barely covering the surface, the wind moves the water around, just enough to level the surface completely. Flat and smooth. Smooth and flat. No matter what, the water table is always just a couple of inches below the surface. It's like being on the moon. The Bonneville Salt Flats are located in Utah , approximately 90 miles west of Salt Lake City . Just to the west of the entrance to Bonneville (on Interstate 80) is the little town of Wendover , UT. A couple of motels, a couple of restaurants, a truck stop, and because Wendover is on the Utah/Nevada border, a couple of casinos. Birds do not fly over Wendover, either. There are no dogs or cats in Wendover. In fact, if you want a pet in Wendover, scorpions or tarantulas are what you have to choose from. Dogs and cats (when found) are used for soup stock at one of the restaurants (I forgot which one). It's the same restaurant that has “tossed brown salad” listed on the menu. There is some history in Wendover for you military buffs. The old World War II hangers and airfield used to train the B-29 pilots that flew the Enola Gay are still standing, and look the same as the day the planes took off for Tinian before going on to Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The history of the Bonneville Salt Flats is always with you, no matter where you go or what you are doing. It gets into your bones. To walk out alone onto that gigantic flat sea of white, very early in the morning when it's still cool, and watch the sun come up over the horizon, is something you will never forget. It's almost as unforgettable as that Nevada hooker I was telling you about. |